Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Leaving the Mom's Group and Cutting Ties

So for quite some years I belonged to a Mom's group. It was really great in the beginning. Everyone got along and it didn't feel clique-ish or anything. In the beginning. Obviously when you get a group of 20 women together it doesn't stay that way for long. People left, some stayed, some new ones came. Things were changing constantly. I decided I didn't like where it was going and I left.

Then a year or so ago, I decided to rejoin. My 3 boys were in school and it was just me and my baby girl. At one point some of the originals (like me) left. So then it was me and a handful of other moms. Some of the moms that were left were...drama filled. I am just going to put it that way. 2 of the moms always rubbed me the wrong way. I never got a good vibe off of the one, for sure. They quit the group and then it was down to less than 10 moms. At this point, I was just plain aggravated. Things got better for a while and then at the end of the last school year...well, it started to go to hell again.

I think I am just in a different spot again. I don't NEED this group and I don't want to put up with some of the petty BS that goes on. Some women seem almost possessive of our friendships and it has gotten really hard for me to deal with. I don't like that. I think I have just outgrown it. Really. So I left. However, there's this thing called Facebook....somehow we seem to "invite" one another (or all 5 or so) to go to the park or go to dinner, etc. Some people seem really sensitive right now that if you don't reply within their certain time frame, then they get upset. They get upset if you write on someone else's board or go do something with someone else. In the meantime, they are doing that as well. My thought is that you can't have it both ways.

It's just become a pissing contest, in my opinion. It's very sad that we all seemed to have this tight bond and then POOF. It's gone. Things won't be the same. I am all for POSITIVE changes. I am. I have made some for myself this year, as a matter of fact. I don't feel like I need a million "close" friends. I am good with having a handful. I am also fine with staying at home with my family.

But how do you let go of some of the friendships when Facebook is involved as well? I am in a different spot than I was last year. I like a lot of these women, don't get me wrong. However, things have changed. Do you limit what they can see on your wall? Do you leave FB the same? What do you do? How do you move on without being mean or hurtful?

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